New Blog Updated: I am officially no longer MORBIDLY OBESE! Even exacerbated asthma can't bum me out today!!!

Yay. I'm celebrating!
Please update your links and follows as needed to the new blog. Thanks.

I am officially no longer MORBIDLY OBESE! Even exacerbated asthma can't bum me out today!!!

My pic at Suite 101: "Fat People Can Do Pilates Equipment Workout"

A pic of me from this blog post originally published on  this blog in June showed up in an article over at Suite 101. The article is titled "Fat People Can Do Pilates Equipment Workout."  And yes, I'm proof fat people CAN.


I've published a page with my Pilates workout pictures from both the June OUAD blog posts that featured them over at my new blog in a tab page: Phat Pilates.

If I was a trainer or Pilates stuidio owner, I'd start "Phat Pilates" classes and do an outreach to interest the overweight and obese and morbidly obese. 


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185 --The Magic Number Where I'd Stop Being Obese

I was fiddling with the NIH's BMI Calculator. I know I'd done this before--trying to figure out where I stopped being obese, etc, but I'd forgotten.

So, I did it again.

The WHO's classification for obesity is this:

BMI	Classification
< 18.5	underweight
18.5–24.9	normal weight
25.0–29.9	overweight
30.0–34.9	class I obesity
35.0–39.9	class II obesity
≥ 40.0	class III obesity

Well, at my highest, my BMI--as approximated using the NIH calculator-- was 48.3. That means that at 299, I was in a subset of Class III obesity called super obese.

When I started this blog at 289 lbs in 2007, my BMI was 46.6. Still super obese.  Today, I was a scosh over 263, which has my BMI at 42.4. No longer in the worst category, but still in Class III. This is morbidly obese.

To leave Class III, I'd have to get down to 246, at which weight my BMI would be 39.9 and Class II Obesity, and I'd be considered severely obese.  At 216, I'd have a BMI of 24.9 and be in Class I--plain old obese. No scary modifiers.

But 186 lbs is THE magic number: No longer obese at all. Merely categorized as overweight. BMI of 29.9.

The SUPER MAGIC NUMBER: 154. This was my weight on my wedding day. My weight at my first gynecological exam. My weight when I was 23. It was all UPscale from then...  This was normal weight for my height, right on the border.

Which is funny, cause in the back of my mind, I've always wanted to be that poundage again. Not cause of the weight charts.  Not cause I looked slim. That was the upper end of my doctor's weight chart numbers for me, for my height. I clearly felt a bit chubby. I couldn't shop at "normal" stores, cause they didn't have my size. I still was not slender. I even had hubby take pics of me in a bathing suit and hated the sight of my pudge. (I wish I was that pudgy now, dangit.)  BUT...I was "normal weight."

154. Wedding Day Weight. Normal Weight. Youth weight.

Yeah. It's a very significant number.

I don't expect to get there. I'd love to, but I think the caloric sacrifice would be too much to even KEEP me there, if I got there. Big if. I choose to be realistic these days, and I don't know if I could be happy with that sort of caloric restriction. Shoot, just staying under 2000 is hard.

But 185. I can dream that without an immense twinge of disbelief at impossibilities. I can be "just overweight."

After two decades plus of obesity, merely overweight sounds really, really good. I can aim for that. I can dream of that.

It's not a bad dream.

If you want to fiddle with your numbers, HERE.

Fat Gals CAN Do Pilates! Even MORBIDLY OBESE ones! Here's Photographic Proof...

UPDATE: A pic of me from this blog post originally published on ONCE UPON A DIET blog showed up with an article over at Suite 101. The article is titled "Fat People Can Do Pilates Equipment Workout."  And yes, I'm proof fat people CAN.

~~~As promised, the pics of me during one of my Pilates training sessions. The pics were taken 6-10-10 and I was 265 at the time (for reference, for the fat gals out there who wonder if THEY can do it at X pounds. I have done it at 278 lbs, too.). I am an apple shape, meaning I carry my fat mostly in the middle, principally in that forward danger zone: the abdomen. My belly is huge. It actually IS an impediment to movement. So, we work around it.

If you aren't familiar with Pilates or are and have been intimidated by the equipment or think your size is a barrier, then I'm here to say: try it.

Yes. Fat folks can do it.   Here are pics of a plus-sized gal doing it. She's the only one I've been able to find online shown doing various poses.

The exercise community seems to be lagging behind the reality of what's going on in the US. They have only recently begun discussing how to deal with overweight/obese clients. And I've seen some advise the client to lose weight first. (Excuse me?!) But little by little, I see that conversation widening. (Not fast enough, not wide enough, but some). When I began doing Pilates in 2008, those pics I linked to were NOT online. I couldn't find pics of big gals like me doing Pilates, never mind BIG MIDDLE-AGED gals. :D

But we're the ones who need to exercise THE most, and many of us have back pain issues, joint pain, and could benefit from the increased core strength (to carry that heavy load) and flexibility.

I have bad knee joints and one slightly wrecked ankle, and I purposefully chose Pilates because it's easy on the joints and low-impact. I did fear I wouldn't be able to use the strange apparati (not strange now, but strange to me prior to doing it). I will confess that getting on and off the Reformer is TOUGH for us heavyweights. But you'll only look like an overturned, drunk turtle for a few weeks to a month, then you'll look like a sober overturned turtle, then you'll start getting up and off with more ease as you get stronger.

The Cadillac, though, is great for us. For big gals and guys, getting down to the floor and back up can be tough (especially if, like me, you have to be super-cautious about what you do with your knees). But the Cadillac is higher off the ground and it's a breeze getting on and off. I strongly recommend that if you're a big person, you tell your instructor to let you use the Cadillac to start, along with Reformer work, and avoid the mat as long as you can.

So, here it is. A morbidly obese, middle-aged gal does Pilates:

Okay, first pic is me on the Reformer (the apparatus that most folks will associate with Pilates, invented by Mr. Pilates himself.) It's got a sliding part you sit or stand on, springs, attachments, a foot bar, etc, so diverse and numerous exercises can be performed on it--for warming up and for strengthening, for arms and legs and core and back, etc. Here, I'm working upper body. I am sitting on a short bench in order to modify it to accomodate my belly (lets my legs extend without straining my lower back. I am doing the Airplane, which is part of the "essential" Pilates Reformer repertoire called BACK ROWING PREPS.). Like many Pilates moves, this LOOKS easy in the pic, but you are constantly focusing your attention on proper form and breathing, so I tend to be deeply in my brain coordinating the postural and breath stuff. I do less well on the breath being asthmatic, but when it's good, it does help a lot. Depending on the way the machine is configured (for tension), this can be REALLY CRAZY HARD.

Hah. Speaking of breath, you can see my cheeks puffed up here as I blow out air on exertion (ie, I'm pulling up on the rope). Again, this is the Reformer, I'm on that little bench for modification , and I'm in a half roll-down position doing biceps curls. (I do have hard lil biceps, too, now!) It's WAY harder than it looks when you've got a gazillion fat cells in the way of tucking butt under and holding stomach muscles curled so as to support weight with the core. This exercise is also part of the Essential Reformer Repertoire, back rowing preps category.

It took me a good, long while to be able to do this, and it's STILL really hard for me. I went into Pilates with the upper body strength of a newborn, I swear. My trainer has been merciless (thank you) with the upper body work to get me to a better, stronger place. (Man, can I carry a lot of groceries now.) But it's still not my forte, and anything where weight is supported by my upper body and is on my puny, carpal-tunnely wrists, it's tough.

In this one, it's your CORE that is pulling you in (ie, sliding in the carriage), not your arms. Your arms stay still and firm and long, and, here's the kicker, your pelvis has to come forward (the shifting of weight is killer),  and then your abdomen has to do the work. So hard. That first pic is the out position (the carriage is slid out some). Here's the in position: my core pulled in the carriage.

I will add that it's very hard for me to do some straigtening moves (of arms, of legs) in particular positions, as my fat IS an obstacle. But that doesn't mean you can't modify or do what your body allows, safely.

Aha! At upper left--the Push Through with Modified Teaser on the Cadillac. This exercise starts with you laying down and then you lift your head and roll up your torso as you lift the bar.

To accomodate my level (I am NOT advanced yet) and my belly, we've done the legs in a diamond position. Here, my knees are bent with feet together.

We decided to see if I could get my legs straighter: a push through with teaser. And here's that move at left.

It's really tough for me to straighten my arms here due to the obstruction of fat in the upper arms/upper back/neck. But I do try. :)

We move over to the ladder barrel usually for the last minutes of the session. (The pics above are not in the order I did the exercises, as we began on the Cadillac, then moved to Reformer.)  Side bends (hate em, get cramps in my hips if I'm not perfect on form) are tough. You are lifting your upper body weight with your core, especially focusing on your obliques. Down and up. Down and up. I've done it with feet in this position and higher on the rungs. With arm out and with both arms bent with hands on forehead.

Again, I'm blowing out that air. Hah. Glad I did my pedicure before my trainer surprised me with the picture-taking.

After this, we tend to do stretches, getting me cooled down safely.

And we usually end a session with a roll down, which means standing, feet parallel, hip distance apart, then rolling down from the neck and down vertebrae by vertebrae until you just hand loose, then you tuck your pelvis and scoop your abs and roll up vertebrae by vertebrae to a slow count of 4, exhaling.

I didn't have pics for every exercise and stretch we did in 55 mins time, but these are to show what might be included in a workout on various apparati.

I hope if you're a fat gal or guy--obese or morbidly obese--you won't be afraid to try Pilates. I always feel so much better afterwards and, yes, it helps your activities of daily living and SEX. :D  As you can see, snuggish fitting clothing is good . This--in the pics-- is one of my baggier tops for Pilates, and I have camisoles, tank tops, and racerback tops, all sleeveless and all more snug,  that I wear as well. I also have Danskin shorts and bootcut pants that I've worn to a session, but capris are my fave, as they do offer my knees a layer of cloth to absorb sweat for the "on my knees" moves.

There it is. As promised: Fat Princess Does Pilates.

Now there's pics of TWO of us supersized, Pilates-loving ladies on the internet.

If you are in the Miami area and want to try a private session to see what you think of Pilates, do call Liza at The Pilates Room in North Miami Beach.  I strongly recommend a couple or more private sessions BEFORE undertaking classes, as you need to learn about proper Pilates posture (imprinting is hard for some to "get") and what will be the needed modifications for your larger body type. The link takes you to their site with contact info, class schedule, and bios of the instructors.

Later, and a happy, healthful Tuesday to all!

WARNING: These photos are the property of this blog's owner and cannot be used without permission and should not under any circumstance be hotlinked. But feel free to use a regular link to use this as a reference as needed to help other folks who have weight problems and wanna do this great form of exercise and rehab.

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Are You Saying "I'll Go When I Lose Some Weight" Before Going to the Gym, Pilates or Yoga Studio, or the Pool? THEN Stop Being Afraid & Stop Making Excuses

Woman glances into a gym as she walks by. Woman peeks through the Pilates studio's window as she heads for Subway. Woman studies Yoga studio's ad and thinks, "My belly and thighs are too big. I can't do that. When I lose weight, I'll try it."

Yeah, that was me.

To some extent that is me. I still won't go to LA Fitness, cause it's so huge and packed it feels overwhelming. But I do go regularly, and have gone for two years, to a Pilates studio, a wee airy and sunny place where my big fat body is welcomed.

Today, I was reminded of that years-ago me that was so afraid to walk into the studio. My trainer mentioned a heavy gal (she said the woman was somewhat larger than me, but hippy as opposed to appley) who came to the studio recently, but said she'd come back when she'd lost weight. What had happened was that she'd gotten gastric bypass, had lost a lot, but then had regained it all back.

I told the trainer that maybe she could invite the woman to watch me or join me during one of my sessions, so she could see that, yes, a VERY fat woman could do Pilates. I have no problem being observed if it makes it easier for a fellow big gal do something good for her health. She should NOT wait "until I lose some weight."

I used to think that very same phrase. And it kept me from doing a damn speck of exercise for 5 years cause, you know, I never really lost all that much weight while I waited for that hypothetical slimmer day.

So, is that you?

Have you been wishing you could try yoga, Pilates, spinning, an aquatic aerobics class, but you are afraid you'll be the biggest gal in the group? Are you intimidated by the equipment? Are you worried your baggy workout wear will make you stand out amidst the tight-spandex-n-cotton wearing slim folks?

Quit that. Exercise has multiple benefits (and especially so for the overweight and obese and, yes, MORBIDLY obese like moi).

My tale, the quickie version: I had wanted to try Pilates for a couple decades. But I'd see those poses and machines and thing, "Fat me will never be able to do that." A studio opened up a few years ago nearby. I'd drive by and see the sign and think, "Gee...I wish...gee..." But I never stopped in.

Then, about a year after I started this blog and had lost a handful of pounds and realized I needed to get my mushy, muscle-less, couch potato bod into some movement, I research Pilates. It seemed joint-friendly and not taxing to my weak lungs (ie, I get exercise induced asthma and aerobics is tough on my breathing AND my knees/ankles, as I have a torn ACL ligament and just plain old OLD and BAD knees from carrying the weight of 2, 2.5 people for way too long.)

It took me another couple months to get up the nerve to call and ask if they could handle a morbidly obese client. Then it took even more nerve to put on workout wear (a semi-baggy long tee with leggings) go in the door. I was TERRIFIED. I was thinking they'd say, "Oh, we were wrong. Our equipment can't handle 275 pounds."  I was afraid I'd totally fail.

Well, figures my first several sessions there were, two, count em two, beautiful, impossibly long and slim, leggy models who had sessions at the same time as me. (I felt like the muddy giant toad next to the pearl-and-sunlight festooned princesses. I am not kidding. These women were so lovely they had to be DNA-enhanced mutants.) But you know what, nobody laughed. Nobody made me feel bad except ME.

Two years later, I still go to the same sunny, airy room and get my muscley mojo going. I am still too fat (but about 10 lbs lighter from the highest weight as which I did Pilates ). I still need to adapt some of the moves to my apple-shape (my belly is an actual obstacle to some classic positions, so we work around it). I'm not afraid of the equipment. I actually LOOK FORWARD to the Cadillac and the Reformer (my two fave pieces of equipment). I kinda like the Wunda Chair (and got the Malibu Chair to do stuff at home). I use the barrel, the fitness balls, the magic circle, the bands, the straps, the toning balls.

I'm not intimidated to say, "Oh, this position is bad for my lousy knee. Can we do this another way?" Yes, you CAN do it another way. If your teacher is well-trained and certified, she or he can FIND a way to accomodate your body type.

I even wear shorts and sleeveless snug tanks and camisoles now so the trainer can better see my muscle-engagement. Does that look good? Heck no. I'm 267 lbs in a teeny weenie top and tight bicycle length Danskin shorts and capris. This is not something I want to photograph any time soon. But when I go there, it's about EXERCISE, not looks. I wanna be comfy and I wanna facilitate the trainer's observations and coaching.

To be honest, I used to look like an overturned turtle trying to get on and off the Reformer. While I am not a ballerina of grace now, I can more easily do that. Muscle helps. :D

I'm hoping with this callenge to drop some belly weight and be able to improve even more. I want to do Pilates without special accomodations for a morbidly obese apple-shaped body. I want to do it with the freedom that comes without massively excess adiposity.

This is part of my ultimate health goals: To lose enough weight to feel really free in any position in Pilates (adjusting for weight and joint sensitivity issues).

Note: The two images are of the actual Pilates studio where I work out. :) Yep, my big fat body uses all that stuff.

So, if you have put off some form of exercise--a class, training, a gym, Pilates, etc--please remember that you need it MORE than the young and skinny chicks. You NEED to grow muscle and burn fat. You need to get flexible and feel stronger for you own life.

Don't let fat-shame or fat-phobia stop you. Try it. Even if you're the only big gal in a  place--and I am the only morbidly obese person at this studio, and I rarely see even overweight folks there-- you just might inspire another overweight gal to give it a shot. You'd be the trailblazer or example for someone who needs it.

Summer Slimmin's Update: Did 55 minutes of intense Pilates. Drinking water just fine. Eating is good and within calories. I tracked all my foods by "writin' it" at Sparkpeople. Had 5 fruits and veggies as of mid-afternoon. I posted comments on all the challenge blogs that had Monday posts as of 6:20pm EST. Weigh-in was half a pound down. Yay.

Responding to a Pilates Query

Meg asked in a comment on a previous post:

I've always wanted to try Pilates, but I'm super self conscious about trying new classes at the gym. How is it?

First off, from scanning your blog, it looks to me like you are at normal weight and pretty fit (ie, you run and exercise, etc). So, you have nothing to feel self-conscious about...AT ALL!!! Go try a class. Make sure it's taught by a certified Pilates teacher (not just someone who's done it and decided to up and teach it). Form, focus, and breathing matter in Pilates, so you want someone who knows how to do it right and teach it properly, who will correct your form during the length of the class.

Now, back to the self-conscious thing: Girl, I started Pilates weighing 272 pounds and having been a couch potato for years and years. I didn't even know if I COULD do it, much less worry about how dumbass I'd look trying to do it. :)

I've since REGAINED some weight I lost. Last week, I was doing Pilates at 282. I did it yesterday at 278.8. And on the reformer next to me was a model with impossibly long and slender limbs and apparently a 0.5% body fat.

I know about self-conscious.

Add to that that I'm the only obese person doing Pilates at the place where I train. I'm certainly the only MORBIDLY obese person there.

Still, I've been doing it for nearly nine months and I feel more flexible, stronger, my arms and legs have better shape, I can do my activities with more ease (ie, groceries, crouching, reaching), and for a very fat 49 year old woman who was nearly an invalid in the 20th century, I am happy to report this. And even having regained some weight, I look slimmer than when I started. I feel denser, firmer. And my acanthosis got better, so that may be just the exercising after NOT exercising for so long. I was used to being ill with severe respiratory infections two to five times a year. Since I started working out, I got sick ONCE.

Honestly, if I can do it, just about anyone can. And I do qualify with "just about", because I do understand that being significantly larger than I am, 350 or 400 or 500 pounds, has a huge impact on what you can do. I chose this form of exercise particularly because of damage I have to my joints from being fat. It isn't easy on the ankles and knees and hips. Pilates is very joint-friendly.

Getting on and off the Reformer, the most famous piece of Pilates equipment, while easier than when I started--when I flopped and flipped about like a mutant giant turtle--is still not the most graceful activity. But when I"m on it, I do my thang! I've done stuff I wouldn't believe I could have done. Heck, I'm able to do one of the exercises that includes the position to the left on the Cadillac, even while morbidly obese.

I think all of us with fat issues, body image issues find it hard wearing tight workout clothing (snug clothing being essential for Pilates). I know for me, it was really hard. And it was hard walking into the studio with wall-to-wall mirrors and models and skinny dancers feeling like Shamu with arthritis. But a good teacher and an environment that is accepting and wants to foster health makes up for a lot of self-consciousness.

The fact that I"ve stuck to it, 3x a week, hour sessions, for nearly 9 months says something. I've never stuck to exercise this long. NEVER. And I've swallowed my discomfort with being seen in tight clothes moving about to the point where yesterday, in order to march in place with higher knees, I HELD MY BELLY UP WITH MY HANDS out of the way of my knees. I looked demented. But it helped me move with better form. So, ah, yeah. I can't believe I did that. Hah!

Someone in your much better shape and much slimmer form will do marvelously. You'll see a lovely line emerge in your arms and legs. Your tummy and waist will reform. You'll feel longer and sleeker. You will be happy with the results.

I told my hubby this weekend, "Man, if I weren't covered in all this fat, you could see my rocking ab muscles!"

And you should NOT feel self-conscious. You doubtless look very, very good already. :)

And again, for the fat gals out there who've been afraid, just do it. Save the money, get a couple to three personal sessions first to ground you in the breathing, posture, scooping techniques and to use each of the machines and equipment pieces at least once with your trainer. Then, ask what class they think you should take. It's an investment that is worth it.

Princess Pics: Yeah, I'm Really THIS Fat!

I was on my way to Pilates today, wearing my Danskin bootcut pants instead of my capris or shorts due to changing weather (cold front moving in). I had one of my various formish-fitting Old Navy tops for working out: This one a purple racerback that's very comfy. I was used to wearing baggy stuff before I started Pilates. But they recommended form fitting clothing so they can see the muscle contractions, movements, etc. My hair was not so fresh (hadn't washed it in a week), so I clipped it high and back. I cheered myself up a bit by wearing my fave plum lipstick("Craving" by MAC).

Decided to take a pic.

Why?

I'm one of those people who SEES herself thinner in mirrors. It's freaky, but I do. My brain tries to ease the pain, I guess. As a result, I'm always shocked when I see pics on a camera phone or a snapshot and am unequivocably confronted with just how BIG BIG BIG I am.

So, I asked hubby, who was off today, to snap a pic of me with my fat arms uncovered and big belly pushing its unattractive roundness in a shameless display.

Yeah. It's hard to look at. I always get that little horrified spasm when I see my pics. You know, I need that shock. I need it to stay on top of REALITY and not the soft focus version my brain wants to see. Reality is that I'm a grossly large lady. Plus gros.

Okay, so, here's the pic, The Princess in her workout wear in the yard (and that's our poor battered gardenia bush behind me,the one that was sheared in half, then sheared again in hurricanes past):



And, angled to display that belly bulge even better:



I'm a roly poly gal, aren't I? And that's after six and a half months of working out hard. Try to imagine the even rolier and polier squishiness prior to Pilates. Yes, shudder at the image.

Anyway, here's some of my accountability. What a soon-to-be 49 year-old woman looks like when she lets herself go way up into the 270's (and even higher previously).

Lots of room for improvement.

And I think I'm in a hormonal surge time. I've been weepy, though not depressed. Things get to me, like sad news or a touching story--been bawling. Was exercising hard today, and I just started burbling in the middle of some leg lifts (with a band tied around my thighs to make it extra challenging). I just lost it. I kept lifting/kicking, funnily enough, concentrating on the core and keeping the ribs in and stomach contracted and upper ribs just so and so much weight on the arm, etc. And burbling. Tears hitting the mat. Trainer is a bit alarmed, and assures me I'm doing great, even better and stronger than a skinny gal half my age who worked out earlier. I say, "But I feel like I'm struggling so hard." She says, "Cause I'm pushing you, working you to your limits. I'm not letting you take breaks. You're supposed to find it really hard."

I kept going. I finished, but I felt a little silly for being a bawling baby. Then I came home and heard a touching story on the radio and started bawling again. Hubby hugs me and says, "Yeah, get it out. You're having one of those emotional days, huh?"

I'm fine. I'm chipper. But I guess getting my period after a five month absence is really making my tear ducts go into overdrive. :)

I have no idea what the point of all that was, except perhaps that working out hard as heck is good, even if you cry about it, and seeing tough-to-look-at pics is good, even if you want to cry about it, because we shouldn't lie to ourselves.

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What Do TBL and Diet Tribe Have In Common Besides Diet and Exercise?

While watching Diet Tribe tonight, it struck me again that Morgan had gastric bypass, though she never got below 255 lbs, and she regained weight. And that reminded me of Ron from The Biggest Loser, who had bariatric surgery...and I guess regained, too? Not sure, as I missed a whole buncha episodes.

I wonder if we're gonna start seeing a lot of WLS regainers on these diet shows now. Hmm.

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New Bariatric Device Undergoing Human Trial

The following snippet is from "New Bariatric Device Doesn't Require Surgery, Can Be Removed"

Dr. Randal Baker, a local bariatric surgeon, said he and his partners are negotiating with three well-known companies who are bidding to buy the rights to the device he invented, the patented Full Sense Bariatric Device.

The two-section implement, made of silicone and nitinol, sits at the end of the esophagus and just inside the stomach. It is inserted through the mouth by a flexible tube called an endoscope and kept in place by three sutures. Baker said the pressure of the lightweight device is enough to convince the brain that the stomach is full.

The device induced significant weight loss in animal trials in dogs, Baker said. Last month, he and two other doctors inserted the device into three people in Mexico. He said they reported losing 18 percent of excess body weight in less than three weeks, without overwhelming hunger.

Okay, just for perspective, that would be like me losing 22 pounds in 3 weeks, more than a pound a day. Yoiks! (And I calculated that only using my "excess body weight", not my total weight.)

I'm gonna keep an eye on this one. I'm curious to see how the trials end up in terms of results. I think a lot of folks who don't want to be cut into or cut up (intestinally) may see this as a viable alternative, especially if it has far, far fewer complications than bypass or gastric-banding.

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Why Do We Give Kids Foods We Know Are Bad for Our Own Struggling Selves?

With the holiday season in full swing, I've been a bit concerned about how entrenched unhealthful foods are part of the gift-giving tradition. Fatty cakes. Butter-laden cookies. Sugary treats in huge portions in pretty cans and jars and boxes.

As people fighting the fight against fat, we know that cookies, candies, and cakes are things that ought to be RARE treats (or, in the cases of those with bad triggers, banned altogether or modified significantly into less-dangerous versions).

But what do I see, including from women and men as big as I am (or bigger)? People with kids...

They stuff them with candy, cookies and cakes. Not just once week or once a month, but regularly. And moreso in this holiday time.

With childhood obesity a major health concern (some call it an epidemic) in the US (and other nations), we really need to take a look at this. A good hard no-excuses sort of look.

Imagine if we had grown up with our parents more disciplined about what cereal we ate in the morning (no KABOOM or Cap'n Crunch, but whole grain and no sugar--fruit instead?). Imagine if a candy bar or pack of animal crackers was a special weekend treat, and not a regular afterschool yumsy, if the daily treat was apples and oranges and carrots with hummus or celery with Laughing Cow light or a whole grain role with peanut butter. Imagine if our parents stocked the pantry with stuff that was clean, nutritious, no to low-sugar, high fiber, and fresh.

Would we be where we are?

Maybe. :)

But I think we train kids to like what they like. I love fruit because my parents loved fruit and had plenty of it around and made smoothies before smoothies were a commonly enjoyed commodity around town. They used olive oil and vinegar, not bottled dressings. They offered us beans almost daily, so we were all bathroom regular.

But I was the one who grew up from age 2 in this country, so I got the junk cereals that were mostly sugar and refined grains. I got candy bars after school. Sno-cones daily in summer. Pocket money for potato chips and other crap.

Of all my siblings, I am the ONLY one who got superobese (or even obese, for that matter). My brothers and sisters, who grew up in another country, much more physically active and eating more natural foods and much less junk--they didn't develop the crazy food relationship I did. They didn't grow up with junk food commercials on television sending them off into cravings for Milky Ways and pizza and burgers and fries and Starburst and cupcakes and whatnot.

So, when I see someone, especially a parent with weight issues, struggling, on diets, struggling to lose, that same parent buy candy and cupcakes and sugary cereals for their kids, I wonder about the dissonance. Why give them the taste habits and food issues we have? Why not hand them pears and grape tomatoes and mango slices and low-fat string cheese and almonds and raspberries? Why not end the crazy food cycle NOW?

I've begged a particular family member not to inflict our curse on her own kids. She and I are both obese. She has two kids who are currently normal weight. When I see the kids fed crap, it hurts. When I see kids catered to (ie, they don't want to eat the wholesome fair, and just pick at, say, white bread and then rush to eat a handful of candy), I want to cry.

In 20 or 30 years, they'll be where we are. Oversized and health-impaired.

It frightens me, and I don't even have kids.

I, both my nieces and both my nephews are overweight to obese. (Three of us obese, one overweight.) Five out of five of us born in the sixties and seventies in the immediate family--all too big. I don't want the next generation to have this curse. I want them to radiate good health and love good, clean food and be active and be happy and live vibrantly.

If it's not good for us to eat, big as we are, then it's not good for kids to eat, especially in their formative years, when they need the BEST nutrition to build bones and spare teeth from decay and develop the strongest neuromuscular system.

Junk ain't for us. But junk ain't for kids, either.

Why do we not see that?

Maybe it's long past time to tax the hell out of junk foods and treats. How many cupcakes will a kid buy if they're 5 bucks each? How many candy bars if one uses up their whole allowance? I'd rather tax crap that does nothing for one's wellbeing and use that money to subsidize fruit and veggies, so they're more affordable for a family's budget.

I am vowing not to buy junk for the kids in my family anymore. (This will be sooo hard. Habits die hard.) And I'm gonna work hard to break the holiday junk-food giving tradition. I'll find alternatives--sugarless, low-fat, or just plain better treats--like dark chocolate (I've tasted excellent sugar-free varieties) or dried fruit or nuts.

I want the people I love to be healthy and live a long, long time. And I want to be healthy and live longer, too, so I can enjoy their company for years and years.


~

Strategies for The Scale and The Spouse: What I Posted To Chubby Chick...

....just a few minutes ago at her terrific, honest, open JOURNEYING TO LOSE 200 blog. (I'll copy and paste at the bottom of this post. First, I must ramble.)

I figure we sometimes kick ourselves for not being perfect, and we can't. We can't be perfect. Ever. We're human. And we're learning.

Those of us losing A LOT of weight need time to adjust, to learn new habits, to figure out how to work around our triggers, to just learn self-control via good strategies in eating. It's hard work. And it's like learning a new vocation. Weight loss is a new job, nearly full-time in the beginning as we struggle to change old ways. Fitness is a new part-time job. Ain't that true, ladies and gents?

Eventually, the habits take over, and it only becomes a part-time job. But for us, it will never be totally breezy sailing. We have too much baggage. And we may have damage to our physiologies. So, even if losing/maintaining takes up 2 to 3 hours of thought and planning and action a day, it will always be a part-time job. Whether losing or maintaining, it's gonna be steps forward, steps back, more steps forward, steps back.

If the steps forward are MORE than the steps back--as Chuck Swindoll has taught--it's progress, and it's moving towards the goal. And the goal CAN BE REACHED, even if the stages look like two steps forward, one step back. You can reach the finish line that way.

I believe that, eventually, the steps forward far, far, far outweigh the backward ones. I do. I've seen the success stories. They tend to read that way.

So, whether it's scale anxiety or spouses who enable out of sheer love for us, we must deal with it. Whether it's triggers to binge, we must face them and strategize.

As I say in the comment: "It's war."

We need allies.

I'm your ally, Chubby Chick. And I need you to be mine.

Anyway, here's my post for those who, like us, need allies cause we have a long journey to "lose" those pounds and win our good health back, like me and Chubby Chick. Anything in brackets is my clarification that's not in the original comment post. I also corrected the unproofed comment I submitted, heh:

If that's what you need to do,{change to monthly weigh-ins} then do it. Some people have excessive scale anxiety, and weighing often is a hindrance. Others do better weighing in daily, cause it is a tool, just a marker, that makes them THINK about, "Okay, I ate too much salt, the water weight is shwong, today I'll eat less salt and more fruit and water."

We're all different.

I would suggest one thing: Write down a list of your trigger foods, things you tend to binge on, and tape it up somewhere obvious--the fridge, a bathroom mirror, and tell hubby that he must NEVER BUY YOU THOSE FOODS, EVEN IF YOU BEG.

I know that's tough, but husbands love us so much, they want to please us, even if it could kill us, sadly. If I tell my hubby, "I want chocolate cake," he'll get dressed, go to some restaurant or the store, and get me cake.

But I've told him: "Do not buy me junk. If I say I want junk, don't buy me junk. If I beg. Don't buy me junk. I will DIE, if I don't lose this weight. I will get diabetes. I'll have a premature stroke. If you buy me junk, you aid in killing me. So, I know you love me, love me enough NOT TO BUY ME PIG-OUT FOOD."

He's been great. So far. :) But love will break down will.

Be firm with him. Let him know he can't buy you a pizza or cake or ice cream or take you out for pig-outs. Just can't. It will tempt you too much.

It's war, baby. War. And we need our loved ones on OUR side, our allies in the battle, not sabotaging us out of love and a desire to fulfill our food whims.

Tell him, "When I"m hungry, you can get me X, Y, Z, cause these are healthful and good and, even if I eat too much, these things won't do damage."

Get him in on the plan.

And best of luck on those monthly weigh-ins. No matter what you weigh. you're a wonderful human being and easy to like and love. So...none of us here are juding your weigh-ins. Know that.

SLAYING DRAGONS: What Are Your Weight Loss Obstacles?

All good fairy tales have villains and obstacles to overcome.

Every weight loss journey is a quest for something related to that loss--for health, for a smaller dress size, for acceptance, for a more vibrant life with fewer limitations. And every dieter will run into trouble (goblins, ogres, etc). And you and I will have dragons of all shapes and sizes to battle.

It's good to know what you need to work through, over, or around--or just swing hard and decapitate--when you start a new eating plan/healthful lifestyle. We all have histories, issues, physiological quirks, and maybe many of us have medical conditions.

Y'all already know I have Metabolic Syndrome (formerly Syndrome X). But this seems to be more a result--of excess weight and sedentary living and even bad food choices--rather than a cause of obesity. (Although, I'm sure they'll be looking closer at it, scientifically.)

I also have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. My thyroid is basically destroyed by autoimmune processes in my body. It's a shrivelled bit of scar tissue. I have to medicate daily and get checked every few months for tweaks to the Rx. When I was diagnosed ten years ago, I was at a super low point: sleeping 20 hours a day, could barely move, felt tired all the time, was cold all the time, had hair falling out, had dry-straw hair (well, dryer than usual), and dry skin. My face was a puffy, immobile mask.

Interesting that I had to get THAT sick for my doc to notice. I think because fat women have the stereotype of the "it's my glands" complaint, I made sure never to even go near that excuse. And, hey, I actually did have a problem that went ignored for years. (If you have the above symptoms and haven't had your thyroid levels checked, please demand it.)

It took another year and a switch of endocrinologists to get me to a point where I could function, but I've never been normal. I'll still have tired bouts. I still have hair loss cycles. (And no, I have never, ever, ever been on a VLCD. I have a hard time sticking to 1800-2000 calories, much less going down below 1200. So, I didn't wreck my thyroid on starvation dieting.)

I also have a ton of allergies and very, very bad asthma (that I had since a baby and even when I was a skinny girl, so, no, it's not fat-related. It's familial. Autoimmune disease runs in my family, and asthma/allergies, too.)

So, yes. I am working with a few handicaps in the metabolic game and that means weight loss is harder for me. But it's not impossible. It just means I have to plan and strategize and study and learn and come up with solutions...and persist. (See that post below on passion and persistence and imagination.)And I have to find the best weapons for the quest.

Once we get morbidly obese, there's a big, fat dragon in the way. You can't ignore it.

We really do wreck our system. It's never going to be fully normal, I think. We've got the fat cells there, and they don't die or leave town (sans the very nasty procedure called liposuction). We have our endocrinological mess to deal with. Our appetite control system is out of whack. So much within us is fighting hard against cutting down calories and losing fat. We will be hungry. We will have to learn to maximize calories and minimize stress. We will have to plan meals. We will have to measure and learn what normal portions are. We will have to choose BETTER foods than we chose in the past.

We must change INSIDE, not just outside.

But we aren't doomed to failure. We may be doomed to constant battle. We may never see easy victory. But we aren't without weapons.

Weapons abound.

But the very first obstacle to overcome--that first dragon to slay-- is inertia. The second is pessimism.

The first obstacle is what keeps you and me stuck in our rut, stuck in our bad habits, doing the same thing. It's what keeps us from change. The second is what keeps you from succeeding at change. Neither is easy to overcome.

So, get that sword ready. Touch it. Pick it up...

Kill inertia: Do one thing that's different--and helpful for weight loss--today. Change your routine just a bit in a direction that moves your health forward. Skip the processed, boxed, perservatives-riddled, low-cal cookie and have... a plum or some cherries or an apple. That begins to get you out of the inertia. Make ONE change toward weight loss RIGHT NOW, TODAY. Go on.

Then make another change tomorrow.

Kill pessimism: As stupid as it may sound, speak affirmations into your day. Or pray them Or sing them. But do something that fills your mind with positive messages that say, yes, you can make changes for your health. Yes, you can eat less junk. Yes, you can eat fewer calories. Yes, you can learn to enjoy wholesome foods: fresh produce, fat-free or low-fat dairy, broth-based soups instead of fatty cream-based woups, less salt, more herbs, water or vegetable juices instead of soda, whole grains instead of denatured grains, and lean proteins from healthy sources (ie, no hormones, no antibiotic-fed critters). Yes, you can change your meal habits so you eat in a way that keeps hunger at bay. Yes, you can take a walk. Yes, you can take off weight and get to a better place. It's not impossible. Others have done it. You can. I can. Turn off the "I've always gained it back" talk. Turn off the "I can't stop overeating" talk.

Self-talk does affect you. Make it self-talk that helps you succeed, not fail.

Obstacles include impatience, fear, emotional challenges, depression (I suffer from this one, and yes, it really does suck), unsupportive partners and/or friends and family, financial issues, dislike of healthful foods, dislike of exercise (I'm with ya!), dependence on pleasure from certain foods, physical disabilities, lack of self-esteem, abusive situations, etc.

We all have them. List yours. Then, begin to find ways to overcome each and every one.

So, what are your obstacles? Are you trying to figure out how to overcome what stands in your way? Do you have a tip for others on how you overcame one of your particular, specific obstacles to weight loss and health?

Tell us. Give us a link to a blog entry where you discuss this. We all want to be slimmer princesses who didn't wait for someone else to slay the dragons.


~

Edited to Add: Weird. I found this post online...in GERMAN. Heh.

The Biggest Loser: New Season Nears

We're officially in September!

That means that soon we'll be treated to the next bout of fat folks like us competing to lose weight and win a quarter of a million bucks. The premiere of THE BIGGEST LOSER, season four, is on September 11th at 8 pm. That's a Tuesday, and it's on NBC.

But, what comes before interests me even more. On September 4th, NBC will air a "Where Are They Now?" special that visits with some past THE BIGGEST LOSER contestants. I can't wait for that one. I know that ever since I saw season one, I've wondered, "Hey, did they keep it off?"

I'm obviously not alone in wondering about the progress of contestants and winners...

TIME magazine had interest. They ran an update a couple months ago--I posted about it here on this blog--on the winner of the first season, Ryan Benson. Sadly, he had regained most of the weight. Bummer. Such hard work...poof! Gone. I wish him well in his continuing struggle with weight. Maybe by now he's lost some. TIME let us know that Kelly Minner continued to do well, staying slim. Go, Kelly!

PEOPLE magazine had interest, too. They featured a couple who met on the program: Matt and Suzy. They later wed and had a baby--YAY!--and they're still struggling with those pounds. They regained some, clearly, but not most. So, they're still ahead and I know they'll keep at it. I'm happy for them. They make a darling couple. I had been rooting for Suzy to win that second season. She married the winner. That's not bad, huh?

Celebrity Diet Doctor is interested. That site reported on Matt and Suzy (above) and on the delightful Dr. Jeff (one of my very fave contestants ever on the show). Dr. Jeff has done OUTSTANDINGLY and he looks hot! I'm so happy, cause he's a terrific person. Don't you just love to see a guy madly in love with his own wife? He would weep about his wife and kids. Nice fella. And now, great example. That site also reports on Andrea Baptiste, who looks terrific! She kept it off.

The pathetic stats on keeping weight off make the "Where Are They Now?" show one that many of the "Big" viewers will want to see. I suspect there will be more "kept it off" stories than "gained it back" stories. I hope they give stats on how everyone has done, ie. percentage who kept it off or lost more and percentage who regained most or all. That's a reality check we need. The successes cheer us on and encourage us. If they can do it...WE CAN! The ones who didn't keep it up remind us how very, very, very hard it is to lose and keep it gone. They're the cautionary note that must keep sounding in our ears, not to drown out the success and positive outlooks, but to give us a healthy dose of fear. To keep us on guard. Aware.

If they can regain it, even with all those weeks of nutritional monitoring and counseling and challenges...well...

I want to be one of the winners. I know you do, too.

One more thing: I'm happy to report, Jillian will be back for this season. While I liked Bob best in the first season. (What can I say? I prefer the gentle approach.) Jillian certainly GETS RESULTS. :)

I'll be watching. Will you?

Note: If you'd like to try out to be one of their future contestants, they've got a casting call out.

His Most Important Self-Portrait

An artist creates with sight and sound his own unique bit of art that focuses on his realization of life-affecting, health-destroying morbid obesity. He charts his progress in a "round"-about way.

He did a great job, I think.

Makes me wish I had artistic skills (I can barely draw a stick figure.)

DragonFire Factoid: US #1 Fattest Nation

America is the fattest nation in the world — the numbers are shocking. According to 2005 government statistics, 66 percent of Americans are overweight, 31 percent are obese, and 5 percent are super-obese. And growing — the number of obese adults has doubled in the last 20 years.

--Holly G. Atkinson, M.D. in "Eating a Healthful Diet"

When Princesses Are Morbidly Obese... And Princes, too!

I, Princess Dieter, am morbidly obese. That means that I have a lot, lot, lot, LOT of weight to lose. The official definition for morbid obesity is as follows:

a BMI of 35 kg/m2 or greater with severe obesity-related co-morbidity or BMI of 40 kg/m2 or greater without co-morbidity [1]. Superobesity is defined as a body weight exceeding IBW by 225% or more, or a BMI of 50 kg/m2 or greater.

If that's gobbledygook to you, allow me to wave this magic wand I borrowed from the Slenderize Me Fairy--thinnityskinnityshoo!--and translate: If you're more than 100 pounds over your ideal weight or your body mass index is more than 40, you're morbidly obese. If your BMI is 50 or more, you're morbidly superobese. That's depression.

Princess Dieter has a BMI of 47. Morbidly obese. (I do not like the sound of that. Do you?)

Calculate your BMI by going HERE.

If you're curious about that Ideal Body Weight (IBW) thing, try THIS SITE. According to them, I am large-frame (ie, my fingers don't meet around the smallest part of my wrist, with a gap of about an inch). But I clicked both large and medium frame to see what values came up.

If Princess Dieter were medium frame (ie, my fingers barely meet around my wrist) : Ideal weight range is 142 - 156.2 lbs. (64.5 - 71 kg.).You are overweight by 132.8 lbs. (60 kg.).

If I am large frame (which is likely, I've never been remotely considered petite in structure--being wide-hipped and broad-shouldered and not-tiny in the feet, either, even when I was normal weight) : Ideal weight range is 152 - 167.2 lbs. (69.1 - 76 kg.).You are overweight by 121.8 lbs. (55 kg.).

Notice something about those numbers?

They're SANE!

They're not crazy, Hollywood, catwalk anorexic size 2 figures. The complete range (ie, taking the medium frame low and the large frame high) would be 142 to 167 pounds. That's not skinny by a long shot. And yet, 145 was a comfortable weight for me when I was in my late teens and early twenties. That is to say, I was active, flexible, and looked normal, though not slim. I was a size 12/13 back then, and while I wished I was one of the thin gals, that actually was a pretty good size for me in terms of activity and health.

Taking into account the large frame range, I'm aiming for 160. The upper end, sure, but still, that's a number I haven't seen on my scale since the mid-80's. It would be like turning the clock back about 20 years.

I can live with that? :)

So, my current weight? 289. A simple bit of arithmetic gives me the amount of weight I aim to lose: 289 - 160 = 129.

Ouch! I feel the pain. But then, so do my feet and knees and back and general self-esteem.

Did you figure out your ideal body weight? Did you calculate your BMI? Wanna share it here and put down your number, the amount you wish to lose?

The story begins...at 289 pounds and a 47 BMI on Tuesday, May 8, 2007.

When does your story begin and how long is that road in terms of pounds?

Come on. Give yourself a fairy tale name if you prefer anonymity, and join me. How about one of these:

Duchess Dieter
Marquesa Makeover
Contessa Calorie Counter
Lady Living Healthy
Dame Dieting
Princess Willpower
Countess Cooking Light
Princess Portion Control
Queen Low-Cal

If you're a gentleman, you can join in, too. Pick a name:

Prince Power Smoothie
Duke Dieter
Count Calorie Slasher
Marquess of Leansberry
Earl of Exercise
Sir Fresh Produce
King Calorie Killer


Make up your own monikers. Have fun. Start the journey off with a tiara or a crown or a satin sash--and a smile!

:::waving borrowed wand for a happy beginning to everyone:::

Once Upon A Time...

...there lived a not-so-young, not-so-fair, and not-so-royal, not-actually-a-maiden sort of gal who, after many years of frustration and failed attempts at transformation, really and truly and mightily got fed up with being bigger than a castle.

And so, one day, as she puttered among, well, maybe not ashes, but perhaps among the dust bunnies, she made a hopeful wish to be more along the size of a graceful garden shed rather than a humongous queenly residence.

No fairy godmother appeared. No pumpkins changed shape. No mice grew into liveried servants.

So, the castle-sized gal--not young, not fair, not royal, not maidenly--got off her rump and said, "I guess I better make my own wishes come true."

And so, with an eye toward a happily-healthy-after, the gal approached the tomes of wellness and the wisdom of the fitness sages, and choosing one particular star to guide her path--a very shiny star full of joy and hope and light--the maiden embarked on an adventure.

So, the story of Once Upon a Diet begins...

~ ~ ~